Crossing an Old Bridge

Yesterday, I hung out with a guy I haven’t really been friends with for a long time. We were good friends in high school, then each went our separate ways—I wasn’t crazy about all the decisions he was making, but then again, neither was I active in telling him so, or even in helping him out. I let things drift as much as he pushed the envelope.

But the bridge was never burned.

Now it’s the end of the school year, and to celebrate, my younger daughter had a small party yesterday with a few of her friends from the neighborhood. Including the daughter of my old friend, who lives just a few blocks away.

It was good to see him. After the party, I called him back over to help me take care of a small home project. It gave us a chance to get beyond, “Let’s get together one of these days,” and to see what if anything still existed beneath the years.

Turns out, the friendship is still there. Yes, there’s water under the bridge—as much from my doing as anything—but here’s the thing about friendships is: so what? There always is. Part of life is knowing how to move on, to forgive, to forget, or to just ignore.

In a day of “reality” TV where we make mini-celebrities out of the people who lead dramatic, self-centered, petty lives—and major celebrities out of the people who lead the most dramatic, self-centered, petty lives—I feel like my experience from yesterday is important to share. I hope I’m not the only one who feels this way.

Life’s not clean: not everyone is always a good friend, not everything that doesn’t go your way is meant to be a slap in your face, and—thankfully—not every old friendship is gone forever.

Welcome back, old buddy.

Jason Seiden is Co-founder and CEO of Ajax Social Media, a training company that shows professionals how use social media to work more effectively.