Someone else says: “How are you?”
You say… ?
Before you answer…
You are at the center of your own life. It’s your story. The adventures, the stretches of boredom, the moments of courage, the successes, the setbacks, the surprises… all of it is yours. To you, everyone else is a supporting character in your tale; some are major characters, some come and go, many are minor.
But no one else is the hero of your story; by definition, that has to be you.
(Everyone else is too busy being the heroes of their own stories.)
Now, whether you’re a conventional hero or a tragic hero, I don’t know. But I do know heroes don’t whine. Not even Romeo, possibly the most tragic hero of them all, whined. Oh, he lamented, for sure!, but his lament—always constructed in beautiful, mellifluous, iambic pentameter—was much deeper and more heartfelt than a whine. He owned his pain. You knew exactly why he was suffering.
Hopefully, you’re not a tragic hero. But even if you are, don’t whine about it.
No one likes a whiny protagonist.
Now, the next time someone asks you, “How are you,” keep in mind that what she’s really asking is, “How’s your story going?”
Answer like a hero.
Jason Seiden is Co-founder and CEO of Ajax Social Media, a training company that shows professionals how use social media to work more effectively.
I'm the CEO of Ajax Social Media. We're helping 1 million people shine by making their online stories better. 
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Jason, while I was reading your post, I thought back to my grandmother and when she was getting older and people would ask her how she was doing, she would recite all of her newest ailments, aches and pains. Then I heard my grandfather (for this couple, think: arranged marriage in Sicily — they tolerated each other for 50 years) chastise her in a gruff manner and say, “people only ask you how you’re doing to be polite, they don’t REALLY care how you’re doing, nor they want to hear all of the details!”
I thought that was pretty insensitive when I first heard it, but as time went on, I found it to be true. When we’re talking w/family or close friends, we may listen. When it’s a colleague or acquaintance, it’s easy to tune out the whining and negativity. Plus, it’s stifling! We all have our days for a pity party and it’s best to locate a more appropriate venue for that.
@Kimberly—Perspective changes everything…
In my other life, I’m a screenwriter, and no moviegoer likes a whiny protagonist, either! While I like the thought of answering like a hero all the time, there are days when it’s just not gonna happen. But Kimberly’s point comes in here, as in screenwriting: consider your audience. A romantic comedy audience doesn’t come for a diatribe on world economics, and most people who ask “How are you?” really don’t want to know! I say, be a hero as often as you can and own your story–but find a good listening ear or two for when you’re feeling unheroic.
@Heath—Amen.