Leaders get paid to make tough decisions.
Now, for introverts, tough decisions are just that: tough. It’s tough making a decision when you know that tomorrow, when you see everyone, they’ll all think you made a mistake, resent what you did, and grumble about how a trained monkey could have done a better job than you.
For extroverts, tough decisions are damn near impossible. Extroverts’ energy source doesn’t come from within, it comes from the flow they have with others. Which means trying to make a decision that puts them at odds with the people they’re “leading” is like trying to make the decision to swear off food. It doesn’t work.
And that right there is the difference between popular people and leaders: popular people need the crowd; leaders don’t. We really see the difference when the chips are down and the crowd demands leadership. At that moment, extroverts pander to the people, giving them what they want, while leaders take care of the people, giving them what they need.
If followers were hungry kids, the extroverts would be handing out candy while the introverts would be handing out vegetables.
And that’s why extroverts can’t lead: they need their followers so much, they’d never risk losing them by suggesting something their followers might not like.
Jason Seiden is CEO of Ajax Workforce Marketing. Ajax amplifies brands by aligning employees' online messaging.
I'm Jason. I run a brand agency with a specialization in workforce marketing.
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I’ve been trying to articulate this idea for a while, but could never get the tenor correct. You’ve hit it spot on.
Such a counter-intuitive notion, but as an extrovert, a painful admission to have to make.
Thanks for sharing!
- Dwane
I agree that extroversion can become an obstacle in leadership. But to claim that it’s insurmountable is spurious.
There are leaders who happen to be extroverted–and therefore gain energy from being with people. Then there are people-pleasers–who are addicted to the approval of others. Not all extroverts are people-pleasers. These are the types that make lousy leaders.
Oftentimes, it’s an extroverted leader that shows strength when communicating before and after a hard decision. Her visibility increases clarity and comfort with the decision. Maybe it even invites feedback that informs good decision making in the future.
Fellow extroverts, Seiden’s post is a warning…not a FAIL card.
Jason, I like your assertion that yuu will struggle to lead if you retain an addiction to approval.
Greg, I appreciate your spin — it’s a yellow, not a red card.
I found this article from ex-Pfizer exec Mary Jo Asmus to be an interesting summary of extroverts and leadership.
Seiden–I think you are just trying to pick a fight with the extroverts in your audience. I’m not biting on this bait. Extroverts can lead just fine.
@Dwane—Painful, but actually not as insurmountable as I make out, as others have noted.
@Greg—Despite what I just said to Dwane, I actually think extroversion is indeed an insurmountable character flaw in would-be leaders. Introverts can learn to communicate clearly. Extroverts cannot “learn” to put their energy source at risk. So while they may be great communicators, I’m still left wondering if they can pull the trigger.
@Dick—Despite what I just wrote to Dwayne and Greg, I believe that very few things in life are black and white. The idea of a “struggle” is spot on—truly, an extrovert’s ability to lead is a question of degree: to what degree does zhe need the crowd? And do you have the fortitude to struggle through it to get your job done?
@Jason—Who wants a leader who leads “just fine?” I want to follow outstanding leaders.
Carl Jung’s model of introvert/extrovert (there’s actually a third element) is too limiting to determine who might be the better leader. Anthropologist Helen Fisher and psychologists David Keirsey and William Moulton Marston aggregate behavior into four personality types. Marston built on Jung’s work to relate an individual to his environment. (If the name Helen Fisher sounds familiar, it’s because she built the model used on the dating site chemistry.com.)
The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator® is based on Jung. The DiSC® indicator is based on Marston. The catch is people don’t belong to just one type. While one type may dominate, an individual usually has traits belonging to other types.
A brief (very brief) summary of DiSC is:
• Dominance: Direct and Decisive.
D’s are strong-willed, strong-minded people who like accepting challenges, taking action, and getting immediate results
• Influence: Optimistic and Outgoing.
I’s are “people people” who like participating on teams, sharing ideas, and energizing and entertaining others.
• Steadiness: Sympathetic and Cooperative.
S’s are helpful people who like working behind the scenes, performing in consistent and predictable ways, and being good listeners.
• Conscientiousness: Concerned and Correct.
C’s are sticklers for quality and like planning ahead, employing systematic approaches, and checking and re-checking for accuracy.
For a couple of examples, sales professionals tend to be D’s, direct, “just the facts” Joe Fridays. Accountants and engineers tend to be C’s. Ask a C “what time is it?” and he’ll tell you how to build a watch.
A leader will draw on qualities from all four profiles: decisive, take action, energize others, be a good listener and planner. The sales rep may be extroverted and the accountant may be introverted, but its the mix that will produce a leader.
@Josh—Well put.
Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva, one of the most successful politicians of the age, is an extrovert whose famous formulation of how to succeed in the world is “do the obvious”.
The notion that extroverts hate to piss people off is totally unproven and hardly in keeping with everyday experience…….
@Martin—Who said extroverts hate to piss people off? I know a few extroverts who get quite a bang out of lobbing conversational grenades. What I said was that it’s exceedingly difficult for extroverts to stand alone, and I implied that when faced with tough decisions this difficulty requires more courage to overcome than is found in the average person. I stand by that.
Hey Jason,
I’m late jumping in on this one, but feel the need to comment. I’d like to offer a counter-point to your assertion. After years of employee relations work, I’ve seen many introverts who are bright people and that languish over important decisions, but simply lack the self-confidence and presence necessary to communicate their thoughts effectively. This is where I feel extroverts (who also need to put in the time necessary to make good decisions) leave introverts in the dust. If you don’t have the courage to step up and speak your mind with confidence, you aren’t leading anyone. You’re serving as a “trusted adviser” to the real leader in the room.